Ducks Discuss Implicate Order
Symposium Held at Family Farm
The Astrophysical Ducks recently held a symposium at The Family Farm with the subject "Bohm's Implicate Order and Eggs." Specialized group discussions were held on "Why Urbanites Cannot Possibly Understand Physics", "Examples of Degenerate Thinking Found in Semi-Tropical Academic Environments", and, the attendees favorite, "Worms are Tastier than Worm Holes."
"Quack," quacked the keynote speaker, the sassy duck with the white mark on her throat, "Anyone who has laid an egg can understand the concept of implicate order." "The universe wasn't created for ducks," she explained, "but Ducking requires that the universe and physics function as they do. Duckness, the idea of being ducklike, is an abstract static mental representation of humans. Ducking is the activity by which ducks define the universe."
The Dark Drake presented an exciting paper, "Does the Implicate Order hold Inside a Black Hole?" The answer he proposed was in the negative. "If an egg in a black hole can become a duck, then the implicate order holds. Such a thing is not possible, therefore the implicate order does not hold within the black hole," he concluded.
The luncheon speaker was the duck without the white mark on her throat. She began with, "Why don't ducks cross the road? Because they don't want to step on any quacks." Her message was well received by all attendees.
In other activities, the ducks continued to lay an egg each every day. Somehow, they discovered that free range duck eggs sell in Lawrence for $1 each, a fact which management verified on a trip to the store which sells such eggs. The news really hasn't affected the duck's attitude much, they already were about as superior and overbearing as a bunch of ducks could possibly be.Return to Farm News First Page